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the great pube challenge (NSFW)

1/3/2014

2 Comments

 
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Photo by Petra Collins.
Listen, I get it.  Pubes are tricky.  And nothing feels better than a delicate, waxed vajayjay balder than the ass of a Scandanavian infant with alopecia.  But come on!  Are we still trying to make our vulvas look like JonBenét Ramsey's?


  
I recently told my family I was growing a 70's jungle bush (don't ask how this came up).  And the response was shock, laughter and dismay.  "How could someone so young do something so Paleolithic?,"  I imagined they wondered.  You're probably wondering it too.  Well, here is the thing.  I'm tired,  I hate razor bumps and a bald vagina front makes me feel like I'm seven.  
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In her book, "The Body Book: The Law of Hunger, the Science of Strength, and Other Ways to Love Your Amazing Body," actress Cameron Diaz urges young women to grow out their bushy blacks.  
"Your pubic hair is a mysterious, confusing, pretty, furry door (more like a beaded curtain?) to your vagina, and you should never remove it because one day someone's going to want to get in there and they'll probably enjoy their stay more if they have to hunt around for the entrance, like they're entering a genital speakeasy."

- Cameron Diaz, "The Body Book"
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Although I don't know about that last part, I'm inclined to agree with Diaz on growing out one's pubes.  So alongside Cameron—since we're all like best friends and all—I would like to issue a 30-day pube challenge.  Grow out that curtain to your genital speakeasy, my friends and tell me about it.  I know that seems rather invasive, but please do.  Somebody do and post a comment on this goddamn site.   I have no comments!
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WAX Santa Monica
But if you don't want to grow out your pubes, that's totally cool.  I believe a woman should do whatever she wants with her peesh even if that means spending hundreds of dollars a year on its upkeep.  Back in LA, I went with a friend to WAX in Santa Monica.  I opted out of their services, but my friend seemed happy to be there and I was happy for her.  Reading their menu, I was shocked to hear how many ways one can wax a bikini line.  There's brazilian waxes, sugar waxes, waxes with Swarovski crystals and even "Boyzilians" for the manly men who wax their bikini lines, but are afraid the term "brazilian wax" is too emasculating.  It's a different world.  A world I'd someday like to be apart of when I have the funds, but until then, I'll be enjoying my 70's jungle bush and the extra $50 per month.  

2 Comments
Leonard
1/7/2014 06:02:01 am

This blog post makes me very happy.

Reply
Mary Hetts
1/18/2014 10:00:39 am

You are SO ahead of the curve Athena!
Just saw this on facebook

http://chicksontheright.com/posts/item/25264-controversial-pubic-hair-now-that-s-a-post-title-i-wasn-t-expecting-to-type-today

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